Thursday, December 24, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Caroline Reid, better known by her stage name Pam Ann, is an Australian comedian. Reid portrays the air-hostess Pam Ann, a mixture of drag, camp andglamour, and a pun on the airline Pan Am. Reid as Pam Ann can be seen on tour in the United Kingdom such as at The UCL Bloomsbury, she also has a guest-role in the BBC show Fast Track. She also frequently conducts shows in major cities in the US, Canada and her native Australia.
Performances tend to emphasise the vagaries of air travel, including the identifying quirks of various airlines around the world, mixed with a generous dose of ribald humour and double entendre. Reid often caters to airline employees and frequent travellers in her audience, directly involving them in the performance.
|Pam||Pam Ann||Her signature character|
|Lily||Singapore Airlines||A Singapore Chinese-flight attendant who would sacrifice passenger safety for her Gucci handbag|
|Valerie||American Airlines||An ageing American flight attendant from Texas, who is usually accompanied with a man in an Osama bin Laden mask|
|Vanity||Virgin Atlantic Airways||A sultry, woman in red who asks that passengers call her sex line at 0 800 747 400|
|Mona||British Airways||A BA attendant who has appeared with a horse-head instead of a face and "piss off" attitude|
|Donna||EasyJet||A typical, ignorant chav dressed in orange with Croydon facelift and hoop earings|
|Vespa||Alitalia||A perky Italian woman who greets passengers with "Ciao! Belissimo! Donatellaversace!"|
|Chantal Jemeladonne||Air France||A snobby fashionista who walks the aircraft aisle as if it were a catwalk|
|Marcia||Unspecified Africanairline||Dressed in flowing gowns and accompanied with soul music|
|Heidi||Scandinavian Airlines System||A stereotypical Swedish blonde woman who usually appears undressed with coffee pots strategically located|
|Conchita Rosa María González Gómez||Iberia Airlines||A tiny Spanish woman with bright red hair and sings "Fanta Do you wanna Fanta? Fanta? Fanta?"|
|Helga||Lufthansa||A brash, dominating woman who barks out commands and orders|
|Unnamed Arabic Woman||Emirates Airline &Etihad Airways||A woman with a chador and ski mask talking gibberish that resembles Arabic.|
|Unnamed Indian Woman||Air India||A woman in a sari who ignores passenger's requests on call button (made by herself), while declaring "I am fingering the air hostess, but she is not coming."|
|Malaka Pustis||Olympic Airlines||A cigarette smoking, kebab meat cutting woman who says pustis pustis pustis malaka tzatziki.|
|Gloria||Qantas||A Qantas air hostess who wears the typical Qantas uniform. While giving the safety video, she states some of Qantas defects. She also offers a full "head to toe" licking for everyone who still chooses to fly Qantas.|
|Sarah||Virgin Blue||A Virgin Blue air hostess who offers passengers salty nuts. When a hostage tries taking her hostage, she offers him oral pleasure.|
|Clodagh||Ryanair||An Irish flight attendant who often syphens fuel from other airlines and repeatedly shouts "I LOVE MY JOB"|
Monday, December 7, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
- An A340-541 with registration A6-ERG is to be re-delivered to Emirates after 4-5 months of repair. Earlier this year, the aircraft suffered from a tailstrike during the takeoff run. It wiped out some runway lights, Instrument Landing Antennae and just cleared the boundary fence. After takeoff, it circled Port Phillip Bay to dump fuel (necessary for emergency landing) while the cabin was filling with smoke. It landed safely with its 225 people on board.
- Emirates could use an additional 20 A380s on top of its existing order for 58 aircraft and is looking to take over delivery slots other carriers have abandoned for other jets. Emirates needs larger planes because DXB's runway system has limited capacity. The airline is looking into picking up delivery freed up by other airlines for Boeing 773ERs and changing its Airbus A350XWB order to focus more on the larger A350-1000, rather than the 900 series.
- The Al Maktoum International will be used by international carriers. EK operations remains at DXB. It is said to be 10x larger than DXB. With 6 runways, it can land 4 aircraft simultaneously. DWC and DXB will be connected via high speed railway system and via Dubai Metro. The airport will be operational in 6-8 years.
- Emirates CEO Tim Clark told that the carrier is increasing its global network in the future which EU will play an important role. MAD (Madrid) and CPH (Copenhagen) are under evaluation. TXL and STR traffic rights are still to materialze since they haven't been granted yet by the German Government.
- Berlin forces up Emirates' business fare
- Emirates Airlines has announced plans to launch its second destination in Japan with its flight to the country's capital Tokyo that will begin on March 28, 2010. Emirates will fly non-stop five times weekly on every day of the week except Tuesdays and Wednesdays.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Airline president Tim Clark said the current fleet was operating “flat out” and existing orders have been allocated to new services, prompting the Dubai- based company to assess the ability of Airbus and Boeing to source extra planes.
“We’re sounding out who’s got more just in case we decide to go ahead,” Clark said in an interview with newswire Bloomberg. “The fleet order we have in place is probably not as big as it needs to be.”
Emirates posts 165% rise in H1 profit
Dubai-based airline Emirates on Thursday said that first half profit more than doubled, boosted by passenger traffic gains and cost cutting.
The largest Arab airline said that net profit rose 165 percent to AED752m ($205m) in the six months ending September 30, from AED284m ($77m) in the year earlier period.
But revenue declined 13.5 percent to AED19.8bn ($5.4bn) in the period, and the company said it could take one to two years before demand for air transport picks up.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
"With the A380 as it is today, and as popular as it is today, why would you go back to the 747?" says Emirates Airline president Tim Clark.
The Dubai carrier had been pushing Boeing to develop a version of the 747-8I with the range capability to operate year-round services between its base and Los Angeles with an economic payload of around 370 passengers.
In parallel with Airbus's A380 weight reduction effort, Emirates has been working on its own savings says Clark. "On our own we've already taken out about 2.2t of operator items." This was partly due to a reduction in the potable water carried for the two on-board showers.
Through Airbus's effort, Clark believes that "by 2012 [deliveries] the manufacturer's empty weight of the A380 will be a minimum of 2t lighter on top of our 2.2t". However, he thinks the A380 will "always be challenged" to serve Los Angeles from Dubai.
The airline operates a 266-seat 777-200LR on the Dubai-Los Angeles service, and while Clark rules out the larger -300ER being capable of serving the route with an economic payload, he is awaiting news about the Boeing's plans to develop or replace the 777.
"Boeing knows we're very keen," says Clark, who expects to hold a meeting with the airframer "soon" to discuss ideas that could lead to a 777-300ER-sized aircraft capable of operating the Los Angeles route. "Even if they give us 8-10% [performance gains] by modifying the current 777, then we've got a chance getting that to Los Angeles," he says.